Beauty jokes

My boyfriend thinks I'm
beautiful
Well
they do say that love is blind !

Monster: I'm so ugly.
Ghost: It's not
that bad!
Monster: It is! When my grandfather was born they passed out
cigars.
When my father was born they just passed out cigarettes.
When I was born
they simply passed out.

Last night I dreamt I was
dancing with the
most beautiful girl in the world
What was I wearing ?

I can't understand why people say my
girlfriend's legs look like
matchsticks. They do look like sticks - but
they certainly don't
match.

I don't think these photographs
you've
taken do me justice.
You don't want justice - you want mercy !

Two teenage boys were
talking in the
classroom. One said, 'I took my girlfriend to see 'The
bride of
Dracula' last night.'
'Oh yeah,' said the other, ' what was she like
?'
'Well she was about six foot six, white as a ghost and she had
big red
staring eyes and fangs.'
The other said, 'Yes, but what
was 'The Bride of Dracula' like
?'

What did the really ugly man do for a living
?
He posed for Halloween masks !

Your ugly.
And you're drunk.
Yes, but in
the morning I'll be sober !

Beautician: Did that mud pack I gave you for

your girlfriend improve her appearance ?
Man: It did for a while -
then it fell off.

Mary: Do you think my sister's pretty
?
Gary: Well, let's just say if you pulled her pigtail she'd probably

say 'oink, oink '!