Cat jokes

"Doctor," said the
patient, "I need help! I
can't stop acting like a cat!"
"How long have you had this problem?"
the doctor asked.
"Lest's see," said the patient, "Mom had the
litter in '41

A guy walks into a laundry run by cats. "Excuse

me", he said to
the cat in charge, "Can you get milk stains out?"
"Sure," replied
the cat. "We'll have that stain licked in a
minute!"

If a cat won an Oscar, what would he get?
An
a-cat-emy award.

When you call a dog, they usually come to

you.
When you call a cat; they take a message.

Why was the cat afraid of the tree?

Because
of the tree bark.

Q: Why couldn't the cat speak?

A: The dog
taped his mouth.

What do cat actors say on stage ?
Tabby or not
tabby !

Teacher: Name four members of the cat
family
Pupil: Daddy cat, mummy cat and two kittens !

What is another way to describe
a cat ?
A
heat seeking missile !

What is an octopus?
An eight-sided cat.